Six
Ways To Beat The Stress Of Buying A Home
DEATH,
DIVORCE & MOVING are the three most stressful
experiences in life. There are two very different
kinds of needs that people have while moving. First
there are the transactional needs, like finding the
home that is just right for them, finding a seller
who is realistic, negotiating the price, filling out
the paperwork, handling the escrow, and arranging
for the move. But there are also emotional needs that
are involved when moving, and this is where the biggest
stress comes in. Any competent agent will handle the
transactional needs for you, but if your emotional
needs are unfulfilled, you'll be frustrated and may
not act in your own best interests. The ideal real
estate agent is one, who is competent with paperwork
and numbers, but can also guide, direct, and counsel
you through the emotional ups and downs of moving.
Here are the six best ways we've found to beat the
stress.
1. Begin with the end in mind. Have an ultimate scenario
of where you're trying to be. What will life be like
when you get there? How will it be better than where
you are now? Dwell on that picture and write it out,
fill up at least a page about how it feels in the
new place. This is imperative. Having the goal in
front of you at all times energizes you to achieve
it, in spite of setbacks and frustrations. Emotions
will run high and you need an anchor. You too must
focus on that future goal when
anxiety threatens to get the better of you.
2. Be flexible. In your monetary calculations, overestimate
by a thousand dollars. In this market, anything can
happen between contract acceptance and closing. It
could be the inspections reveal areas of concern that
the seller is unwilling to fix or the repair costs
are higher than the amount limited in the contract.
Or the interest rate changes which affects the necessary
down payment and closing costs you will need to come
up with. As your real estate team, we will strive
to tie up loose ends as quickly as possible, but remember
there is no perfect world. Most buyers feel a bit
overwhelmed when taking on a new mortgage and the
responsibilities of a new home. We've seen many buyers
get angry when it seems like the cost just keeps going
up. Anger is caused when reality doesn't match up
with the expectations you had in your mind. So if
you anticipate this happening
in advance, you won't get angry. In fact, it'll probably
go better than you expected.
3. Trust in the process. There's just so much to do,
it's easy to panic. You wonder if it will ever work
out. In fact, when we bought our house, we couldn't
eat for a day, we felt sick to our stomachs! You think
you're taking a big chance, but the truth is you're
giving yourself a big chance. Even though you can't
see every step of the way, as you move towards your
goals, the way opens up. We know that you haven't
moved in a long time and it's a major upheaval in
your life. But we've been there many times before,
and we'll be looking out for you. Trust that we know
the way to get you there.
4. Get knowledge. One thing you'll probably feel during
this transition time is being out of control. It feels
like everyone else has taken over your life. The seller,
your lender, the appraiser, the inspectors, they all
have the power to say yes or no to your moving plans.
We'll try our best to let you know ahead of time what
your expenses will be, and what the unknowns are.
We'll tie down the loose ends as soon as possible.
We'll try to get your loan approved within a reasonable
time frame. We'll educate you as best we can and let
you in "behind the scenes" so you won't
ever feel stupid or out of control.
5. What is your option? When things don't go as smoothly
as you had hoped,don't let emotions take over. Always
ask yourself "What is my option?" because
there are always options. Let's pretend the lender
takes longer than agreed upon to get your loan. He
keeps asking you for more and more documentation until
it feels like he also needs to know how many gold
fillings you have in your mouth! You feel upset because
you wanted to feel certain about the move and now
you still have to live with the uncertainty. You want
to say "Forget it, I'm fed up with this!"
But what is your option? Find a new lender and start
the process over again? That
may take weeks, plus you will have to provide all
the paperwork all over again. If the lender is trying
his best, it may be better to give him a few more
days. Each case is unique, but when setbacks occur
we've found that asking yourself this question helps
to defuse the situation and restore clear headed thinking.
6. Seek entertainment. When there's nothing you can
do about the situation, take your mind off of it altogether.
Maybe you expected loan approval on Friday, but now
it won't come until Monday. You hate being in limbo
and feeling powerless. So do something else entirely,
maybe something where you aren't powerless. Take a
hike, play tennis, get out of town for the day, watch
a movie, pray, or pour yourself into your work. Whatever
diversion works best for you, now would be a good
time to engage in it. Just forget the situation and
refuse to listen to those irritating thoughts when
they come into your head. Think about something else
instead and just take it one day at a time. To keep
stress to a minimum, here's how we'll serve you when
you work with us in buying your new home: a) we promise
not to take your business for granted, b) we will
inform you of your options c) we will give you our
best-reasoned expert counsel and advice with your
best interests in mind, d) we will clarify your goals
and motivation, so that you can decide if moving is
the wisest choice at this time. e) we will provide
recommendations and information to help your kids
through all the changes f) we will negotiate effectively
for you to get the lowest possible price for your
new home g) we will protect your interests during
escrow, keeping a detailed record of the transaction
h) we will be your levelheaded sounding board or relief
valve when the stress is overwhelming i) we will counsel
you through the feelings of "buyer's remorse"
j) we will alert you ahead of time to every possibility
so youfeel more in control k) we will contact you
daily during the last 10 days of the transaction to
serve your needs l) we will provide guidance and help
with movers, change of address, utilities shut off,
cleaning, etc. m) we will continue to give you information
of value after the transaction... for life.
